As a relationship and couple's therapist in Oakland, CA, I am often asked by clients whether they should stay in their relationship. "My partner drinks too much, but they're trying..." "My partner works too much..." "We get in huge fights..."
"Should I stay?!" Well, I have a few questions for you...
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Is there a secret to having more productive conversations with family and friends about hot button issues?
Marshall Rosenberg, the creator of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), identified a set of universal human needs that he believed underlie our feelings and behaviors. These needs are considered fundamental and shared by all people across cultures. In the framework of Nonviolent Communication, these needs serve as a basis for understanding and resolving conflicts.
As a couples therapist in Oakland, CA, I often advise partners to "approach the bear" when their partner is angry. 🔥 𝘙𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴' 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘤𝘺. 🔥
𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖊 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌 is simple in concept but at times, difficult to execute. As a queer couples therapist in Oakland, CA, I often coach clients and provide opportunity to use 𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖊 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌 skills. 𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖊 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌 is listening with the intention of deeply understanding another person 𝕒𝕟𝕕 helping another person ✨feel✨ you are fully present to hear about and understand their experience.
As a couples therapist in Oakland, CA, new clients are often curious about what happens in couples therapy saying, "I know how regular therapy works, but what about couples therapy?"
As a trauma therapist in Oakland, CA, I integrate DBT skills in helping clients with emotional reactivity.
A Spotify playlist with some of my favorite podcast episodes on attachment theory. These are episodes I recommend again and again as a couples therapist in Oakland, CA.
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AuthorStephanie Bain, LMFT Archives
April 2024
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***Resources are not a substitute for therapy and are not intended for making diagnoses or providing treatment. Not all practices and tools are suitable for every person. Please discuss exercises, practices, and tools with your individual therapist or health care provider.
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